Tuesday, July 12, 2005

The Hot Club

Hooks was at the HC with his new girlfriend Cat Woman. She has a 22-pound cat named Malcolm. Hooks met Malcolm recently and the cat wasn't friendly. So we figure that every time Hooks tries to get cozy with Cat Woman, Malcolm will be there to meddle. I said it would make a good situation comedy. Wise called it "Malcolm in the Middle."

Wise was saying how notorious Hooks is for keeping the house temp at 65ยบ even during winter. Cat Woman said she liked it warm. Hooks told her, "Two words: buy sweaters." Cat Lady laughed and said that would change. Mr. Bill told her, "You need some training here." Cat Woman promised that the heat would go up. I said, "Hooks will melt."

Overheard in the HC men's room: "Best toilets. Worst space." Best toilets???

Talked to Mr. Contraire about the odds of winning the state lottery. I thought that the more people in the lottery (like for mega millions), the worse the chance of winning. Contraire insisted that the odds don't change because the same number of numbers is needed to win each time. This is a question that The Crier could answer. Astrosmike?

At Thursday's PawSox game I ran into Dale and his friend U Maine John who have Bob Uecker seats - front row, Section 9 (the red seats). The Maine Man asked me if I knew how you could tell a blind man in a nudist colony? His answer, "Oh, it's not hard."

And Section 8's Dale and Donna told me that they recently visited the Hot Club deck. Dale said, "It could use a little varnish."

Beau introduced me to a young lovely named Adrian: "Isn't she beautiful?" he said. Later Adrian was overheard talking about "7 nipples." Her girlfriend said, "She's into litters."

Mr. D. was packing a lot of ones. A guy who saw him buy a round asked Mr. D. "Strip club?" Yup. Mr. D. said he went to the ATM and took out 100 ones.

The Lovely Lisa was inadvertently left off the list of potential pulchritude for a Hot Club calendar. Lisa should know we would never leave her out. She wants to be Miss April.

Wise said that Kevin has a new nickname: "Commercial-free W-KEV."

Thanks to Steve and Chuck D. ('I'm an expert on mouse balls') for helping to get my mouse back to going left.

Brock was at his best: "Hi, my name is Pat. Pat McGroin." And to Mr. D., "Hey, he's nuts. Grab 'em."


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