The Hot Club

THE HOT CLUB Last Friday the Hot Club was graced by the presence of Patti Quimby who stopped by with a couple friends. Patti is always a welcome sight at the HC where she once bartended, making scores of friends and fans. The Hot Club has a couple new High Def TVs, welcome additions to the bar, improving the view for all sports fans. Stephanie stopped by and liked her inclusion in last week’s Zine where she pointed out that she was left standing there while we men talked cars. It reminded me that Vinnie had pointed out that Ford did not make many of its car parts universal while competitor Chevrolet did. Then I recalled that Stephanie was there and we were talking cars again. The Falcon has landed. Per my investigative reporter, the Falcon was spotted holding court outside the Whole Foods at the Sockanosset Crossroads in Cranston. The sleuth told me that the Falcon takes breaks to go inside Whole Foods and score the freebies. That should keep up his calorie count. My Mickey Spillane says that the Falcon still is selling that Iranian money he cornered the market on. Contraire overheard this conversation and while he knows the Falcon did not seem to know about Sockanosset Crossroads, repeatedly referring to the river instead. Contraire doesn’t get outside of Providence much, especially the Atwells Avenue corridor. Of course it might just be Contraire being contrary again. Kelley passed the mosquito zapper (looks like a small tennis racket) to Claudia. Claudia, whom we are glad to see back working at the HC, said that the bug zapper can be dangerous – to humans. Claudia said that if you hit someone in the face with the bug zapper that it could fry their face. Foot Joy said “Where’s Contraire?” Yes, zap that bug! I asked Foot Joy if the Red Sox had won their afternoon game against the Mariners. Foot Joy (and Contraire who chimed in) told me that the Sox were playing a night game. Yet I had seen it in the Journal sports - a 3:30 game. So I searched for a ProJo which the HC usually has hanging around but to no avail. Foot Joy and Contraire of course ragged on me for not getting it right. When I got home I checked the ProJo – yup they had it as a 3:30 day game.

The Hot Club

Stephanie was talking to us on the deck. Her friend Vinnie stopped by. Somehow the talk turned to cars. Vinnie said that when he was 14, he used to take out his brother’s Corvette. I said every red-blooded American male wanted to have a Corvette. Then I mentioned my Datsun 240Z. Mr. D. used to drive an MG and a Mustang. All of sudden, Stephanie said, “Oh, guys! You’re talking about cars! I’m here!” So I said to her: “I was just about to ask you what kind of car you drive.” We changed the subject. FootJoy was wearing a new hat. I asked the Wise Man what he thought of the hat, and he said it was good. Then I asked Wise what he thought of what was under the hat. FootJoy said something about ‘needless rejoinders’. ORric mentioned ‘AMF yoyo’ to me. What is that? It stands for ‘Adios, mother f**ker, you’re on your own.’ Contraire had a copy of Maxim magazine. He showed me a picture of a Russian woman and then added, “Well, you don’t want to be russian them.” Charlie Clancy introduced me to his nephew Matt who predicted that Jason Varitek would be the next Boston Red Sox manager. Turns out Matt is also a Dawson (unrelated). When I told Charlie that I hoped the Patriots meet the Giants again in the Super Bowl and finally beat them, he said that he hoped the Giants were undefeated when they play the Pats in the Super Bowl. Comeuppance! The PVC pipe in the Hot Club men’s room says Besh Kosh with a couple of what looks like crosses or crucifixes. Where’s Kosh? According to Dr. John, Rhode Island is two feet larger at low tide. Doorman Marty walked by me on the deck and I noticed he had a paper trail, paper sticking to his boot. He was past me by then but I saw Beau and suggested that he tell Marty. Beau laughed and said “I’m not telling him!” Sportzine is also available at jimdawsonsports.com (Thanks to Buffalo Steve)